I am worthy of you, not because I’m the prettiest face in the crowd. Or because I have the sexiest body you can ever imagine spending the night with and waking up next to the morning after. Or because my kisses are unforgettably sweet. Or because…I tried to make all these become my reasons for being worthy of you.
In fact, I believe I’m worthy of you because I didn’t.
I know my worth. It’s beyond what others see, and much more than what I think. That’s precisely why I’m worthy of you, because I simply am. I am both broken and whole. And when I’ll be with you, I will add to who you are and not take away from everything you built before I came. I’m strong enough for you to need me. And soft enough to need you. We can take turns crumbling. Or we can do it together.
You see, I can stand alone. Our “we” can alternate as “we” or “me and you”. And either way, you’d know I’m not in it just for the taking; I’ll be there for the giving, too. I’ll be there for the everything, and stay for the nothing.
I’ll ask for your forgiveness in advance, as there will be times when I forget “we”. I’ll rub it in your face, tell you I don’t owe you…tell you I don’t need you. And, chances are, I mean it. But, I mean it even more when I say I choose you and I’d rather not be without you.
I’m happy by myself. I’ll be blessed to be with you. I always asked for you to come to me, though I know I can handle everything myself. And, I know you can, too. We don’t need each other to be happy. We just choose to be happy with each other.
I’m whole without you. I’ll be complete with you. See, there’s not much difference, and yet there’s a world of it. I know what you are to me, and I understand what you mean to me. Which is why I’m thick enough to say I’m worthy of you.
I won’t say I’ll recognize from the get-go; I don’t let my heart work as much as it used to.But I say I’m worthy of you, if only because I will let you grow on me, till my heart beats again. I shut a lot of people down. I’m making space for only you.
I don’t want a “we” or an “us” with anyone else, and until you come along, I won’t allow myself to. I don’t need my heart to love again. If I had a choice, I’d rather it wouldn’t. But I’ll open it up again and fight against my own will, to let you in.
I’ll put it in your hands, let pieces of yours meld with fragments of mine. Yes, if loving you means letting my heart beat and break again, so be it. I’ll stay awake through and through, and love you anyway.
You may think this as mindless blabber, and it very well may be. But I guess, all I’m trying to say is that I’m saying this, not so much to convince you, as much as to remind myself. I’m worthy of you because I’m worth it. I’m worthy of a you that’s fully mine and entirely yours. I’m worthy of a “we” that’s both “us” and “you and me”.
I’m worthy, because I can love you, and I will choose to inspite of myself. I will add to who you are. Grow with you. Fight for you. Argue with you. I’ll be around, worthy as I am.
Believing you’re worthy as you are. Looking forward to falling in love with you.