It’s the most wonderful, and dreadful, time of the year. The cuddle weather of the holidays can be a major bummer for single belles like me; it’s a reminder that, after all these years, I still have to spend it with me, myself, and I. Couples go around doing their Christmas shopping, with bae carrying bae’s loot for bae, and I’ll be walking around, with a heavy shopping bag in tow, figuring out how I can get away with sneaking it into the MRT station, without the lady guards forcing me to unwrap my purchases.
Ang bilis ng panahon, no? Last year, single ka. Ngayon, single ka pa rin. Walang nagbago. Bumilis lang ang panahon. SO TRUE.
After a decade or so of being a single Belle, however, I realized that Christmas doesn’t have to be so bad, and, regardless of your relationship status during the season, you can and will still have #goals to meet. Of course, finding love is one of them. But, for the most part, it’s about learning what to do and making the most of the love that’s already there.
Here’s my list of relationship goals I want to achieve, as a single belle, this holiday season and beyond.
Best Buddies With My Body
Food, weight gain, and snide remarks about my body are holiday staples. Though unwanted, they can be inevitable, and I understand that it takes an objective and healthy outlook to stay body positive during the season.
Being best buds with my body is a major #relationshipgoal, because I never fully felt confident about it. I want to top the year off knowing I pushed and nurtured it as much as I need to, and that regardless of what it looks like, I own it. To achieve this, I already began doing some health tweaks, like cutting on my chips intake, drinking more water, regularly walking, and getting back to routine commutes. They’re a natural form of exercise.
I’ve also made it a point to wear clothes that work for me and I feel good in. Little steps making noticeable changes, not just to my body’s appearance, but also to my overall body image.
I also try to listen to it more. When it craves, I eat. When it’s stressed, I rest. When I start to be out of breath when I walk, I walk more. This way, I know I don’t deprive it, and I don’t spoil it, either.
This Christmas, I plan to flaunt it proudly, the way I show off my BFFs. Now, which outfit to wear?
Fan of My Face
If you’ve been following my blog, you’d see my pre-glammed up photos and know about my litany of skin issues. I’m not much of a looker, and it’s sad that, despite the many self positive messages I can write about here, I can’t bring myself to be proud of how I look.
Comparisons with prettier relatives are a given in holiday reunions, and any girl can’t help but feel like shrinking when faced with well-meaning comments that are in poor taste. Even then, that’s not reason enough to not be a fan of my looks.
Being happy with how I look involves making the most of what I have, even if it takes some work, and I’m willing to do it. While I’m all for the au naturel look, I admire the intricate artistry of applying makeup, and I’m having so much fun seeing how I look, with and without it.
My relationship goal with my face this year and beyond, is to reach the point when I know I can look better, and still think I look awesome as I am. I want to be a fan of my face, bunny teeth, round cheeks and all 😀
Fam to the Fam, and Homie to the Homies
I enjoy solitude. I think there are very few things that are better than quality alone time. While I do crave good company, I don’t usually ask friends and family to join me in my adventures (READ: takas-gala hehe). Before and after the year ends, I’d want to better communicate with my constants, because they, especially the fam, are my constants, whether I like it or not.
I know I would not always get the advice or response I want from them, and we don’t usually talk feelings and stuff. But we could try. Having issues with one another from time to time doesn’t mean there isn’t any love. There is; it just needs to be given the chance to adjust and to be available to everyone.
For my part, I need to give the people who love me the chance to love me the way I want. In addition to being available to people, I need to talk to and actually deal with them (ew haha kidding).
I know my friends and family love me, but I tend to undermine that sometimes. It’s not helping anyone, so my #relationshipgoal regarding the fam and homies would be to let them be friends and family to me. Even the strong, independent woman needs people to come home to. I’m still lucky they’re there. Now, we just have to work things out.
Friends With The Will Of The Wind
Last weekend, I had a tarot reading session courtesy of Tarot and Coffee Manila’s Jake Morales (thanks, Jake!), and though I’m saving what came out of it for another blog entry, this much I’m willing to divulge: the future looks bright, but it’s not exactly the way I would have wanted it.
Anyway, from that response, I realize that I’m not open to change, and I have not been able to move on from a lot of resentment and bitterness. Those things have happened already, and I can only look forward to what is to come. I know at some point, I will have to accept whatever life throws at me, and I want to do it sooner rather than later.
If I can’t be in love with life right now, then maybe, at least, I can be friends with the will of the wind. That way, there’s less resentment and more acceptance. And life can be life, and I can be me, more genuinely and fully.
They say that as you grow older, your Christmas wish list becomes shorter. My relationship goals with me, those around me, and the world, are pretty much everything I want this season, and beyond. Next year, hopefully, a romance will find its way into this list. But, for now, this is it for me: relationship goals that consist of a lot of acceptance, working out, and love, even sans a bae in the midst of the cuddle weather.
Watch out, world. This single belle is out to achieve each goal on this list. Maybe with bae next year. Charot. 🙂