I’d always count April 2, 2016 as my square one, career-wise. I was working on an article about budget fashion and dropped by N.Cat, a Korean accessories store, in BGC to take photos. It was my first time commuting to BGC, and also, my first time to encounter people who thought I was a blogger. The lady on the photo below, on the left side, yes, her, with the braid, she asked if I was an accessory blogger.
I had a light bulb moment right there and then. Lo and behold, months after, Paisley Purpose was born, with N.Cat as the subject of my first entry on styling. A couple more entries followed, and a few blogger invites came, from an up and coming Korean resto and a talented HMUA. Who’d have thought they’ll eventually open new opportunities for me? 🙂
It’s been more than a week since my last day at work, as a full-time digital marketing writer. With no job security, it’s like starting from square one, which, by all accounts, is still much better than ground zero, and it’s thanks to the blog. It didn’t stay chill, as I thought square one would be, for long. On my last day at work, I got two calls. A message soon followed around a day later. And then two days after my official exit, I landed a freelance gig, one that requires me to go beyond writing.
It’s a temporary setup, I know, but it’s a great start, and it’s one that I really prayed for and about. Just a few days into the job, someone offered me a follow-up engagement, which has all the potential to become long-term, and I couldn’t be more thankful.
Those who follow my blog would know of my constant wrestling with God, and my lack of faith on His timing. Nothing says perfect will and timing better than the turnout of events this past week. I mean, His grace and perfection aren’t new to me, but because I usually resent how they don’t manifest the way I want them to, I end up missing out on the joys they bring.
This isn’t life as I imagined it to be at this age, but there’s no denying that this is way more than I have bargained for. See, God gives you more than you can take, but never more than you can handle. The triumphs and trials, as well as the strength to face them, all come from Him, the ever-abundant source.
At 23, in all honesty, plan A was settling down early in life. Plan B was entering the religious vocation. Plan C was killing off every ounce of character I have to land me a high paying job that just involved doing menial, repetitive tasks. Notice a common denominator in all these? They’re all about me finding acceptance within a particular group of people, the easy way. Never about finding myself and willingly surrendering and collaborating with God. Me considering an entrance to the vocation wasn’t because God extended the invitation to me already; it’s Plan B. The religious vocation is a way of life too special to be dismissed as just that.
And what about my dreams and His plans for me? My only dream is to be accepted by others, so I guess no matter how unambitious plans A through C seemed, they were almost entirely self-centered. Not at all self-respecting and God-fearing. Being God, He gave me some well-deserved disciplining, got me out of work, out of my self-centered and destructive nonsense, and brought me to places, mostly because of the demands of my blog, the very fruit of a gift He has generously gave and shaped in me.
March is graduation month, and years after I have finished school, it still feels like graduation to me. Full of graces, hopes, and new beginnings. Embarking on a journey that involves a balance of chasing, waiting on, standing by, and working hard for, the opportunities that will allow me to live out God’s will the most, is no walk in the park. Thankfully, it’s not one that I’ll walk alone. 🙂
As His plans gradually come into play, I learned more than a few things. First, God will always, always be there, loving you and paving the way for you, whether you like it or not. Second, He didn’t let you go through what you did, just for the heck of it. Through it, He’ll shape you and bring you to where you need to be.
And that destination may or may not be what you thought you wanted. In my case, it wasn’t, and it gave me new dreams and the means to achieve them. Third, don’t let reciprocity be your motivation for doing anything. Whether or not it gives you something in return, do it out of love: love for God, yourself, the journey, and everything and everyone that came together to make it possible.
This is only the beginning, and graces and hopes are already clearly at play. Never mind that it isn’t plan A, B, or C. It’s God’s, and that’s what matters most.
I celebrate and rejoice in it. AMDG. 🙂